Being Yourself

“Be Yourself”

“To thine own self be true”

“Be different”

– I’m sure we’ve all heard these adages. Especially when we feel repressed or if we feel put down. There’s something people forgot to tell you though.

“Be different! Just be prepared to be lonely half the time.”

Especially if you’ve moved and you’re trying to make friends, you’ll find that people don’t trust what’s different because it’s unfamiliar.  This is one of the reasons I loved working in a restaurant. Everyone there was different, so there was no judgement. Or if there was it was by people you could tell were more insecure than you.

It’s easier to “fit in” (become a cookie cut-out), because then you’re accepted.

There’s another problem with that though.. Because then you don’t accept yourself. Trying to make yourself fit into a space where you’re too different is like asking your feet to be smaller to fit a pair of shoes. It just doesn’t happen.

 

Something else people don’t tell you. It takes a helluva lot of courage to be able to stand up to the consistent pressure of being told to fit in and to succeed in spite of it.  Courage and acceptance. Acceptance of yourself, and that the “others” who do “fit in” are also different.

Everyone is different from you, and it’s not a bad thing. It just is.

 

 

 

If you feel so inclined, share a story of how you were different. Positive or otherwise, I’d love to hear some perspective!

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Positively Broken

So here’s the God’s Honest Truth

I’m broken, and so are you.

Do you know how long it’s taken me to accept this fact? I think a little too long…  And damnit if it isn’t a beautiful thing!

If you are like I was 15 minutes ago, curled up crying on the floor with my eyes like pufferfish and makeup streaming like a raccoon, you probably won’t believe me.  But that’s okay! Because being broken is okay.

It’s not about believing that there’s something better for you it’s about believing that you can use your brokenness to help someone else. That’s where I found it.. hope.

I don’t believe that people deserve anything. We haven’t done anything to earn it! We are all f*ck ups and screw up on a daily basis, so really.. How can we DESERVE anything? (pain included, unless you torture animals.. there’s a special place in hell for people that do that).

So me being told that I deserve something really doesn’t resonate. There’s a disconnect there. Now… Tell me that I’m supposed to HELP someone with what I’ve learned.. There’s purpose behind that. There’s a positive, giving purpose. That’s what hope is.  A positive purpose that you can feel, see, and give. That somewhere you’re going to give/make a better tomorrow.

 

All right. enough with the emo stuff. Here’s a cat gif.  🙂

F@$& the world – what to do when you’re angry and frustrated at Everything

Ever scream at the world?

Angry, hurt, frustrated. You scream until your face turns blue then you realize your actually screaming at the world inside you. The face in the mirror that you feel like you can’t escape.

It taunts you. It haunts you. It constantly disappoints. It shows you just how far you are from your ideal, and putting on that fake happy face to try to seize the day kills you a little more each time.

Depressed? Who says?! You’re just not enough, because if you were you wouldn’t feel this way and you’d be able to satisfy the people closest to you.

All of this is a lie you are believing. You are telling yourself and believing in a lie.

Now listen to the little voice, the one that’s been silenced by insecurities for way too long. What does it have to say?

You don’t have to be “more.” You are being prepared for the next step. Take courage and wait.

Pretty powerful words if you let them sink in.

Don’t be discouraged from discovering truth. “The truth shall set you free.” Funny part is that it’s freedom from you. Your insecurities. Oh, and the bullshit you “put up with” everyday.

I hope you find inspiration to listen to that little voice. Coming from someone on the other side, so to speak, it’s worth it.

A “Thank You” for Failure

I fail at life. At posting every other day, and an innumerable amount of tasks. I read a quote the other day that said, “Be nice to yourself. It’s hard to be happy when someone’s mean to you all the time.” So instead of beating myself up I’m going to write a prayer of “Thank You’s” for everything that’s gone wrong.

– Thank you for the dog that escapes when I’m carrying three large bags and a baby and makes me late to the rest of my day

– Thank you for the child that seems to poop through at least 3 outfits every two days

– Thank you for the laundry that piles up and reminds me that I have clothes (or a lack of clean ones)

– Thank you for the toes and hands that I seem to trip over and cut on an almost daily basis

– Thank you for the phone I always seem to drop at the most inopportune time (“Hello?! Are you there?! Customer service???”)

– Thank you for the bills and calls that remind me that I owe someone money (“I receive mail, therefore I am”- Dilbert)

– Thank you for the traffic that reminds me I have a car (and that it’s moving at 2 mph…)

– Thank you for the hunger that reminds me, ‘Yes, I CAN eat peas for dinner, and NO they don’t taste bad”

– Thank you for the annoying people that call customer service for reminding me that I have some pretty cool people in my life, otherwise they’d be considered “normal”

– Thank you for the failed attempts I’ve made (Fried Chicken), if it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t know where my strengths were (grilled Italian chicken and pasta)

Funny part is, I feel a lot better and I’m actually grateful for these things. Even though it might’ve started as sarcasm. 😉 What failures are you grateful for?

Are you serious?!? 5 Ways to Tell if You’re Serious About An Idea

So, I’ve lately been in a bit of a bind. Which is to say, I don’t have any disposable income. A wrong decision here, a splurge there, and BAM! You’re looking at bank account zero. I’m sure a lot of you can relate.

I’ve been playing with all sorts of schemes on how to make a few extra bucks. What I didn’t expect this to become is me looking at my current position and wondering if this is where I really want to be, and what it is I really want to do.

So I’ve developed a litmus test of questions. Primarily to see if any of my ideas are worth pursuing, or if I can see them going anywhere.

The first question you have to ask is, What’s my motivation?

No, you’re not an actor and I get that (Or maybe you are and you ask yourself this all the time!), BUT you need to understand what motivates you to do better.

Example: If you love music, but really you’re motivated by money, unless you’re a superstar you’re probably not going to stay in the game for long.

Okay! So you’ve decided what motivates you. (Money, Applause, Food, Smiles, Puppies, etc.) Next question!

How much do you know about this idea?

The more you know the better your chance to succeed (sometimes). And sometimes you’re one of those people that have so much talent it oozes out their ears and you can’t help but be successful. Kudos to you (now go jump off a cliff.. juuuust kidding).

Question Three. Is it a dream? Or is it a scheme?

Is this something you’re passionate about? Does it fit with your motivation? Or is this something like a get rich quick scheme? Because the only people that succeed in those are slimeballs, and I don’t think you’re one of them.

Fourth question is for the realists. Can you make enough money to pay your bills and eat?

They say that follow your passion and the money will follow, but it’s really hard to make enough money as an monarch butterfly story-teller. Just sayin’.

And the fifth question. How far are you willing to go to achieve it’s defined “success”?

I feel like this is the best question. If you aren’t willing to learn from each bump and bruise and keep trekking then it’s not worth investing your time into. I believe that’s what some people call a “waste.” Now.. That’s not to say not to try. If you think you can, give it a shot! If it doesn’t work out then you have lessons to take the next experience.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and if you have anything to add to this list! Comment below or tweet it at me.